"If we see a tattoo place, we'll need to stop"

This is what Dan and I heard come out of the mouth of an older man - - maybe in his mid-sixties, as we walked through the United Kingdom section of Epcot. I'm usually good at rationalizing but I can't seem to wrap my head around that one.

So Disney World was overstimulating, fun, exhausting, expensive, memorable, and stressful in that magical kind of way. I'm 30 years old and have never been there so I found myself saying things like "Maria, we are going to get on the Honey Pot ride and you are going to stop whining or we can't go back to the hotel and get chocolate milk!" "STOP IT! This is a HAPPY ride!" "We can't go back to the castle because it's closed because they are cleaning it" "HURRY HURRY OR WE WON'T MAKE IT TO FRANCE BEFORE THE FIREWORKS" Statements like these are not spoken in the real world. They are reserved only for the times when, as a parent, you have to sit back and realize that you just might care more about something than a 3-year-old does...and considerably more than a 17-month-old does.

Having said all that, the girls took no time adjusting to the role of wide-eyed preschooler in Disney World. They were decked out with their autograph books, souvenir necklaces, and always some remnant of junk-food in a ring around their mouths. Ava had no problem throwing one of her patented fits anywhere we went. This of course includes the Dumbo ride as they are suspended about 30 feet in the air and Dan is clinging to her for dear life. Maria sat next them completely oblivious as she moved the lever up and down with that crazed look of a mad scientist. That was magical moment #2.

Backtrack just a bit to magical moment #1: The plane ride down. We boarded an teeny tiny little plane that Maria perceptively announced is just a little bigger than Sarah's van. Within five minutes I smell the most awful odor imaginable followed about five seconds later by a voice from the back of the plane yell "Oh my God, JIM....ha ha ha ha you are so obnoxious!" Jim must have had his ass programmed to release every 20 minutes or so...I should remind you...the plane is only SLIGHTLY bigger than Sarah's car. However, all was forgiven as we began our descent into Orlando. The ride got bumpy as we encountered some low clouds. The motion and ass-smell started to get to me and then I heard Maria shout from the seat in front of me, "WHOA DADDY! THIS PLANE IS SO FUN! WHOA DADDY! WE'RE IN THE CLOUDS!". It's hard to be in a bad mood when you realize there's someone on the plane that is just happy to be there.

Magical moment #3 came when Maria picked out one of her many Finding Nemo souvenirs. I asked her to find something for Ava. She picked up a plush Squirt (a turtle who's dad is Crush) and said "Here Ava can have Scrote. His dad is Crotch!" I will readily admit that I haven't corrected her yet.

That's enough magic for now. My Benadryl is kicking in and I need to go think about who in our government, at any level, is most influenced by public opinion. My poor Political Science professor is completely passionate about this subject yet is teaching to room of 30 people who are only there because they HAVE to be. I'm waiting for him to shout "STOP IT! THIS IS A HAPPY RIDE!"